Joshua Turns 1

I cannot believe it's been a year since my little boy came into this world :) I just want to thank EVERYONE who was in attendance at his party this past weekend at Rick & Rachel's! We had a blast, and as we know, before we know it Meghann will be popping out little Pony-Tail Coconut into this world and we'll have ANOTHER little baby to celebrate with, on top of Shea's and Kel's that were born last month!! Pictures are coming, give daddy some time to upload them :)

June, the beginning.

Well, as of the first week of June we have 3 new babies in the family, and ONE more on the way :)

Shea & Kellie had their baby girls a day apart, and they are BEAUTIFUL!!! Shea had Reagan first, on Saturday afternoon around 4 pm! She was perfect and precious and I cannot wait for Jamie's wedding so I can snuggle her!! Kellie had Eliana on Sunday around 430 pm! She is so cute and loved it's not even funny, Addison looks at her with adoring eyes and the pictures are only the beginning of the amount of love he's got for his little baby sis!! And just over 2 weeks ago, Sarah, Shea's older sister, had her baby too!! I'm so excited and blessed to be a part of this loving, growing, caring, supportive family!! Love you, Shea, Kellie, Justin, Addison and new babies!!!

Okay, and the one on the way is... MEGGLES!!! She is pregnant with #3! And Sophie and Cedric are soooo excited it's silly! And me, well, I CANNOT WAIT!!! I love all the babies this beautiful family is blessed with!! Now I really cannot wait for the wedding and the holiday season to come back around so we can have more baby time!!

I volunteered at the Special Olympics Summer Games in Orono this past weekend with a few girls from my work, and I am beat. Those athletes have to be some of the best mannered athletes in the world. I've never seen someone be so happy to come in 7th place, just to get a ribbon. It breaks my heart to remember how angry I'd get not coming in first all the time. It really shows you a lot when you are involved in something of that sort. I am exhausted, but it was well worth it. The sun burn I could have done without though, but the memories will last forever!!!

is it really almost June?...

**Joshua & Mommy at York Beach with aunty Beps!

I could list a million reasons why Joshua, being 11 months old, and passed out sprawled across mine and Chris's pillows right now, is NOT a cute picture... but I can think of some much more interesting reasons why it's adorable :)

reason a: he picked out some cute jammies tonight. A shark t-shirt, and puppy pants. He's so special. The other day, he brought me a blue and white striped sock, and a black puma sock, and wanted to wear them, together. He's my little ham!!!

reason b: we shared an ice cream earlier, and that made my day. My little boy loves cookie dough blizzards ALMOST as much as mommy does!!

reason c: he was so well behaved in the tubby tonight while I sorted laundry on the bathroom floor. Watching him splish and spash and play with his toys in the water is so entertaining!! he's a riot!!

reason d: after his tubby, he helped me sort the clean laundry and put it away! I told him to "put his laundry basket in his room" and he pushed it over there!! He's a genius I swear!!!!!! I love it!

and finally, reason E.... he fell asleep in my arms, with a smile on his face and binky half out :) I love my little boy! We are so blessed to have such a smart, healthy, adorable baby. And I am so blessed to have such a wonderfully, amazing, perfect, kind, caring, loving, supportive hubby! Chris is my world, and everyday is just yet another treat for our family!! It's perfect, and I couldn't ask for anything more!!

Memorial Day weekend was a blast! Meg & Jared were up with Sophie & Cedric, so we splent PLENTY of time with them! I finally found a job I am in love with! I work at a Credit Union [just like Auntie Sage!] in Augusta and it's a blast! We had a big BBQ Memorial Day, Dan & Jess came up with their little girls, Ted & Sage came over with Owen, and Grandma and Grampa Steward came down for the fun! We always have a blast when we all get together! Next get together is Joshua's first birthday party at Rick & Rachels!! I can't wait!! I love my new family!!



OH YAH!!! And Meg & Jared are FINALLY adding to their family... baby #3 to be welcomed to the world in January 2010!!!

a fathers love.

cuddlin' on the couchie pie at bedtime!

"anyone can be a father, it takes a REAL man to be a DAD"

Honestly, watching these two together, you'd never know Christopher wasn't Joshua's "father", but you can certainly tell why "dada" was his first word... and not to Jason. Christopher amazes me everyday with his strengths and qualities when it comes to parenting, a thing that just a year ago he would say to me daily "reason number 029384 why Chris is never having kids"... thank goodness he found the right mommy, and right baby :) We love you very much daddy!!

tubby time!
on lunch at work
at mimi & papas, Chris's parents
in the beginning... when he was "uncle Chris" and "mommy's best friend"
at mimi and papas again!

What?! February is over?!

Oh lord! How did this month fly by soooo fast? Seriously, wasn't it just the beginning of February and I was writing? I thought so. Gosh. So this month has been pretty great, I guess everything is just going to get better in our life huh? Things haven't seemed to get worse at all and I'm pretty damn happy about that! Well, happy about all of it except my little brat of an 8 month old son making BOTH mommy & daddy super sick in the last week [ oh well, it's what we get for open mouthed kisses and co-sleeping on occasion!] but who could resist a face so sweet and kissable?!?!?

Joshuawith Mimi&PapaMommy & Daddy!

You bet not us! haha. We love his kisses, his hugs, his clingy-ness and his cute little "bum leg" crawl! every part of it is great! haha he has come to amaze us in ways we never thought possible. There is a certain love you never really find until your a parent, and I honestly think that until you find that love, you can never love another being, even your soul mate and significant other, the way we should love one another. I thought I was falling in love with Chris when I was still pregnant, but it took until I had had Joshua, taken a good look at my life, realized how amazing motherhood is, and then I fell in love with Christopher the way he deserves. It's amazing what a child can do to you!

So, income taxes came in. Finally. Thank God. And then the money was gone. After about 3/4 of it went to bills, Chris and I kinda splurged on some fun stuff for us, a couple new jackets, some new coach sunglasses for me, a few months of car payments set aside, money in savings, and some toys for Joshua of course! and we took my brother out to lunch, to Portland and Freeport and treated him to some gifts... It was worth all of it! We have such joy in our lives spending time with loved ones, getting to spend an entire Sunday with my baby brother was a great, relaxing trip and we would do it every Sunday if we could! Joshua's been at my mothers since last night, she's keeping him double this weekend so Chris & I can try to relax and get over this illness that seems to be kicking both of our bums... his way of "getting better" is thoroughly enjoying Killzone 2 and Fear 2. He's a big video game freak. And I'm sitting here, ignored for the last 3 hours, and SCREAMING for attention. Haha. No, but really I've just been reading my magazines and catching up on my creeping, LOL.

Meghann, my SIL, got a cell phone on her mother's work plan [finally!!!] so we've been texting and google talking pretty constantly every day! It's so exciting to have someone other than Chris to talk to all day, not that I don't love our chats while he's slaving away for T-Mobile and I'm here, slaving away for him & Joshua. That's right, I'm still home. Going on 3 months of not working, and loving EVERY SINGLE SECOND OF BEING A MOMMY! I love being home with Joshua all day, even if it does drive me nutso sometimes! He's an amazing baby and I love him!!!

Anyway, probably should get something productive done today, but I'll really probably ust go lay on the couch and watch more video games [he's onto Fear 2 now... had his KillZone fix I guess].. take care :) 

lovies!

February...

January is over. The first month of 2009 finished quite amazingly for us actually. We finally got our refund from income taxes for me, which was quite hefty thankfully. We paid all of our bills for february, set aside money in savings and for my car payments for a few months, and splurged with some more of it. Joshua got a few new toys, and some clothes for spring && summer, and Chris & I both got new jackets and quite a bit of clothes and toys for ourselves! I also got a new digital camera! yay! that was exciting. We took my little brother Chris to Portland yesterday and stopped in Freeport along the way, that's where I got my new jackets, at North Face, I got 2. Luckily I can squeeze into a childrens XL, so I can get cheaper jackets than a women's S/M would be! Yay! Hehe. We also went into Polo, and both Chris & my brother got new polos, I got a sweater and 2 tank tops! then of course, Abercrombie, got a pair of pants & a long sleeve shirt! And we had to stop at Coach just to check it out see if the factory had anything nice... and Katie scored a new pair of sunglasses for under 100$! yay!! hehe. Best purchase of the day! Then we travelled to Cabella's and Chris got his new jacket there, it's really nice, black, and it's comfy! Off to the Maine Mall we went from there! We went to The Sports Authority, in search of our cousin Josh, who works as a manager there, but had no luck, so we browsed golf clubs and North Face hats, ended up leaving empty handed. Then I dragged the boys into Forever 21, and ended up getting tons of stuff! it was exciting to be able to purchase things I wanted! Then we browsed the rest of the mall for a bit, went to the Apple store of course, and the baby store to get Joshua a few outfits, and then headed out for lunch. We went to Macaronni Grill and had a great time. We really enjoy spending time with my little brother, he's a great kid!

After our drive home, we picked up Joshua at my mom's and dropped Chris Hamel off, and headed home. We were very happy to be home and relaxed all evening with Joshua. It's been a great start to 2009 so far and I'm just excited to see what the rest of it brings!!

Lovies!

Long Day. Long Night.

Somewhere between Joshua fussing all evening, my being annoyed with every thing occuring in my presence, and getting beyond frustrated with my ball of yarn which is now one giant knot, I realized that I wouldn't trade any of those annoyances for the world. All it took was Christopher laying Joshua down in our bed, my going into the room, and placing him into my arms to realize that this is what I love, this is what I need, it's where I belong, and it's what I was born to do. Between the 3 rounds of dishes, the sweet potatoes and banana yogurt I can still see on the carpet from dinner with Joshua, the 24 paused on the TV [thank GOD for tivo & dvr] due to Joshua's fussing and us not being able to handle it, I fell in love with my son and my hubby-to-be all over again. 

There are some days when I really think I just can't take it anymore, and I just want to curl up in a ball in my bed and cry. And yesterday, I had one of those days. Christopher had a bad day too, and thankfully, and I know I shouldn't say it that way, but thankfully, he was here for all of it. He got up with Joshua. He tended to his cries. He fed him. He changed him. He held him. He rocked him. I didn't touch a diaper or a bottle or an infant spoon until after 3 pm I'd say, and on the day I needed it most, Christopher really proved his daddy skills and his love for not only Joshua, but myself. I really don't know what I would have done without him yesterday, because he's the rock that holds me up, the half that a makes me whole, my best friend, the one I couldn't live without. I know I've got it right this time, and I've never been more proud of myself for the choices I've made in the last 6 months. Thank God I'm finally grounded, he does that to me, and he makes me sane. He saves me everyday! I love you Christopher Robert Hitchings!!!

and Joshua, though I cry, though I scream into my pillow, and shower for 35 minutes just to have those 35 minutes to myself, moving back the shower curtain to see you've opened the door  and are sitting in your walker waiting for me makes me realize that those minutes to myself, though precious and necessary, can never be replaced by the hours, weeks, and years I will spend with you. No matter how frustrated mommy gets, she's mommy, and that'll never change. She loves you with all she has. She will never give up, never give in, and never forget that you're her little boy, her angel, her miracle, and her baby. You're my son, my angel, my future, my love. I fall in love with your deep blue eyes all over again everyday. You make me smile with one touch, and laugh with one smile. Always remember that!!

So, now that it's 20 of 9, we have to be up at like 6 to get to Bangor on time for Christopher's doctors appointment at 820, so I guess we should finish this 24, and get to bed.

Lovies!

New Year, New Home, New Beginnings!

Well! 2009 is here! what a relief! I really am excited to begin a new year, with a new outlook on where my life is going. Having Joshua turned 2008 around for me, and it began a transformation I thought would never come. I've realized what's important in my life. Joshua is my number one priority, he is my savior, my light in the dark, and my main purpose for being here now. The midnight wakings and the early mornings are no longer a big deal to me, they are our special time, our bonding time. And I'll be honest, not having to jump each time in the night when he wakes up is a great help as well in me getting better and getting where I am now. Having Chris wake up to his crying and jump to go get his pacifier, or change his diaper and feed him a bottle to get back to sleep, is beyond helpful, it's really saving me from going crazy! We've been staying the night [and packing a bag every few days from my mothers house] since the end of of November, and finally this past week we got everything all moved in. All we really have left is the crib, but that's fine because Joshua sleeps just as well in his pack & play in his room as he would if the crib were here yet. Within the next few weeks we will get it from my mothers house though! So here I sit, a Thursday morning, Chris is at work, Joshua's taking a nap on our bed, and I'm watching What Not To Wear on our huge big screen tv, flipping through what's recorded on the DVR, and wondering if life could get more perfect... I really don't think at this point it could. Eventually, hopefully soon, I will find something for work, part time is what we are hoping for, and I'll be able to help with some of the bills, but for the time being, I couldn't think of a single complaint on life and how it is. Just this morning I got up before Chris, fed Joshua, packed Chris a lunch, cleaned off his car, did dishes, and felt more like a mother/live-in-girlfriend than I ever have in the 6 months I've been a mom. It's hard to believe how far our family has come in the last few months, having things going the way they are between Chris and I, having Chris turn himself into a father almost instantly, and having instant in-laws and extra grandparents [not to mention an Aunt, Uncle & 2 cousins] for Joshua is a blessing!

I'm so excited about what more will come in 2009! Hope everyone had a great, happy, safe new years and holiday season

loves!

New Years 2009 almost here!

Well! It's been another busy week for us! It's been a crazy month, December. and it's over tomorrow! Today Chris and I went to Augusta with Joshua to spend our Christmas gift cards on things for us/the apartment. I got a total of like 8 shirts and a pair of pants, he got a pair of pants... and we got the essentials we needed for our home: a microwave stand for the new microwave [thanks Rick & Rachel!], a few things for the desk in the front room [yeah, we moved it from the office, which is now Joshua's room!], mixing bowls, wine glasses, a few cute plastic bowls for Joshua, a teapot, and more hangers. 

Things have been pretty near perfect. There's a true connection between us that I wouldn't trade for the world. He said it best tonight when we were driving home from dropping the baby off at my mom's for the evening, he said that he likes that we can just be together, not doing anything, or not talking but doing our own things [i.e, last night he was playing video games and I was knitting on the couch], and just enjoy the time together. We've both never really had that before to the extent that we have fun doing nothing at all. We don't always need to be talking, but just relaxing and taking in the time we get to spend together. It's really something special. Falling asleep and waking up in his arms for every night for the last month+ has been amazing, and I know that moving in this week has only improved our relationship. We are so strong right now that I couldn't imagine us being stronger, but I do say this everyday. Quite like I say I couldn't be more in love with him, but everytime I say that I fall more and more. It's crazy! But I love every second of it! He is the half that makes me whole and my best friend here with me --love you Kiwi & Bethy, now come home so we can all be besties--

tonight we are spending the night in, just us. we're going to watch some Grey's until around 1130, then put on the NYE special and watch the ball drop together. I thoroughly enjoy every moment I spend with Christopher, and I look forward to many many many more happy years together!!! Hope everyone has a great NYE and stay safe and good luck in 2009!

loves!

And Christmas has passed...

Oh boy! What a Christmas! It was filled with so much love and laughter and joy and tons of FAMILY! Here's a recap...

Christmas Eve day we spent a bit of time with Chris's family, in the afternoon, and then headed out to my mom's. We got all the gifts together and headed over to the Tibbett's for our usual Christmas eve festivities. We ate, played with Joshua and Grady [Pete & Cara's little boy thats 4 months older than Joshua], opened gifts and enjoyed eachothers company as always. Joshua got so many cute toys! And Chris and I got movie tickets, a gift card to wal-mart, and I got some lotion and chapstick as well. It was a good time! Then we headed back to Skowhegan and got settled in for the night and waited on Santa Clause... Christmas morning we headed to Chris's parents [Rick & Rachel] around 815... we ate cinnamon rolls and drank LOTS of red drink! haha. Then Gram & Gramp [Rachel's parents] came over and we all gathered around the tree so Sophia and Poppa could hand out gifts! That was a fun time as well, as predicted. Joshua, again, got so many great toys! Thanks so much guys for spoiling him!! And not to brag or anything, but Chris & I had a great Christmas gift wise too.. Chris got from me a Giants shirt, a Boston Red Sox bobble head, a new North Face sweatshirt, a sweater and some new cologne. From Chris I got an outfit from American Eagle, a sweater, Grey's Anatomy seasons 2 &3, and.. oh yeah, UGGS! Finally I own a pair of Uggs! haha. From his parents I got a Bath & Body Works Warm Vanilla Sugar gift set, and from his sister a gift card to Target and some knitting supplies! After Christmas morning we headed out to Sidney to my Aunt Shelia & Aunt Jeans house to do my family Christmas with my mom's entire family! We were super busy!! We had lunch and opened gifts, which took nearly 2 hours - there was like 15 of us! Joshua got more new toys, which he loves so much! I got tons of gift cards and some money as well, which is always helpful!

But more importantly, we had an amazing Christmas being able to spend time together and with our families. I've never been in love like I am with Christopher, and I hope this feeling lasts a lifetime. I can't wait to finish moving in, to really start our life living together. He amazes me more & more everyday!! I am the luckiest girl in the world!!

Hope everyone had a great Holiday Season!

Loves!

standing cold and scared on top of blue hill...

Oh man! Today has been a day! It's so close to Christmas I can't believe it :)

So I went to Wal Mart today, not listening to the wonderful advised my someday-in-law's had given me that it was hell there and it took them forever to get out, I ended up being there way too long! I originally just went to grab the pictures I had printed off for Christmas gifts for family, and I ran into 1093028409 people I know. Okay, not that many, but a couple people from high school, a couple teachers, and then decided "Oh, well, I guess it would be nice to get my haircut today..." So I cut 4 inches off my hair and got the rest of it layered, I think it looks good but we will see when Christopher get's home from work -- he still has  NO IDEA! haha. Oh man. I had just left him, we had lunch at Quizno's because he worked today as usual and I joined him on his lunch break. Quizno's the place of our first meal together, so cute. Haha. Anywho, I think we are just about done our Christmas shopping finally. We really only have to get giftcards now for my parents and his sister and brother-in-law and a few frames for the rest of my family, then we will be done. We are running to Wal Mart when he gets out of work at 830, hopefully at that point it will have slowed down a bit! haha.

Joshua talked so much today! We were riding in the car and every 30 seconds I heard "ba, ma, gah, ba, gah, la , ka" in the backseat. I tried to keep him going but sometimes when I get involved he shut up, so I just let him "sing" along with the music! It's so cute! We also ran into his real fathers parents at Marden's, I'm really glad they got to see him, since they don't see him very often and haven't for almost 3 months now. They aren't really a part of our live, given his father doesn't have a thing to do with him or give a care about him and hasn't since day one, but it's still nice for them to see him every once and a while!

Meghann is coming on Tuesday, I've asked her to teach me her wonderful skill :: knitting :: I figured, it's useful, she's amazing at it, and it could help me pass time and I might really grow to love it. Meghann is a great person, I'm so lucky Chris has such an amazing sister!! Well, I guess I'll go get ready for Christopher to get here, only another hour! yay!

Loves!!

short nap = blog time

Joshua is down for a little nappy before his bedtime bottle, and since that doesn't happen often I figured I'd get on this! It's been so long I need to re-dedicate myself to blogging daily, or at least weekly, so I can keep this one going! It feels so good to get the days stresses off my back by writing them all down, or at least typing them. Things have just been so messy lately it's crazy! Joshua was born in June, but it still feels like it was just yesterday, and it's so hard to believe that next week he will be 6 months old, a whole half a year... wow. amazing how my little baby has grown into such a little man already!!

So Chris and I are moving in together! It's such a change, this one is for real... So the apartment is in Skowhegan, it's the one he's lived in for a while, and he did live there with his ex, but since she is all gone and we got rid of EVERYTHING that they shared, it can finally be ours. We've got a new couch, from his parents, a complete bedroom for Joshua that is going to be amazing once we've got everything moved from my parents house to here. We've got a sign up above the door in our bedroom "Always kiss me goodnight", we've moved the bed, found every last wedding invitation, and gotten rid of all the trash left behind. We're ready for the next chapter in our lives to begin and are more than thrilled that it involves eachother, and us being together!

He makes me smile like I've never smiled before, and he does so much for me that he doesn't ever have to! His family is amazing! His parents are so welcoming and loving and giving towards Joshua and I, they are overall just amazing people. They have showed nothing but respect and love for us since day 1 and that means so much! His sister, her husband and their kids are such special people to Joshua and I already. Their daughter loves to play with Joshua and hold him and show him things like toys and the tv, and their little boy is still trying to figure out who the baby is, but they are so great with him it doesn't matter! I love spending time with them! 

All in all, I'd say this has been a pretty amazing year, and 2008 has proven to be very special to me. I'm grateful for so much it's out of this world! Well, Joshua's waking up again, so I must go. More later!

loves!

Oh Life... 2008 is coming to a close!

Well! It's been 2 years, almost 3, I guess I'm slacking. Things have been going pretty well lately, so I guess I can't complain! Life has changed so much in the last 3 years, I never would have imagined I'd be where I am now!

I have an amazing son, Joshua Joseph, who was born on June 24, 2008! That's him up top there! He's such a ham, a precious little angel. I hardly have time to breathe these days, he takes up everything I have! I stay at home all day wtih him and wouldn't ask for anything more. I was working until He was about 4 1/2 months old, so a month or so ago I got done. I've enjoyed being home with him more than I've ever enjoyed anything in my life, watching him grow is such a gift. Saying that being a mom is life changing is an understatement, it's the most amazing thing life can give you! He's perfect and I love him!!

I also have the most amazing boyfriend, Christopher Robert! He owns my heart and soul and I couldn't ask for a better man to love me! He simply amazes me every single day. He is always there when I'm happy, always there when I'm sad, holds me when I cry and never lets go, even when we're apart. I can feel him taking care of me when he's at work, because he writes, calls, emails, everything possible to get us through a day away from eachother! We are so in love I honestly couldn't ask for anything more in this life. He is amazing with Joshua, which is a gift I could never repay him, since he isn't Joshua's biological father. Chris used to always say he didn't want kids, and that he was afraid of babies... but if anyone see's him with Joshua, they know that's a lie! He's an amazing daddy and we cannot wait to have another bundle of joy of our own [plan:: 2 years at most, too much age difference is no fun!].

Other than that, I guess I can start keeping up on this while the little man is napping and enjoying playtime in his walker / other such toys!

long time!

it's been a while...

sad to say, things worked out with justin for a while... then fell apart... then fell back into place.. then fell apart again... oh well i guess it just wasnt meant to be.

just like the messalonskee boys hockey team wasn't meant to win states?! ugh yeah they were, dude how gay is that. oh well.

not much has happened, but when something good does, i'll let you know :)

<3katie

long time

well, it's been a few days... saturday night went well, had fun as I always do when I am with my baby... sunday we slept in, in tangled sheets :) hehe... then Danielle and I came home, went shopping and I got grounded. Whoop. Grounded for 2 weeks baby. But I suppose it wont last long, cos mom always forgets about that shit. and then monday morning I went to school, and for some reason I got really sick in first block... and I went home. I slept all day, and when mommy got home we went to the hospital. I was there all night. they gave me 2 shots of some crazy stuff and then an IV of this medicine that made me shake, and talk really fast, and then sleep... yeah. it was interesting. so tuesday I was all drugged up and slept all day.. and today was a snow day.. yay :) hehe. I'm feeling a big better... dunno tho. I had a rough morning, but I guess that's all the past. I'm in love. Yay. but anywho, I'm gonna go make some cocoa and kick the boys outta the living room to watch a movie. later bitches :)

<3kait

haha interesting

thought the interesting things from today needed to be posted
1. Dad knows field hockey coach, and her father in law
2. Dad knows everything about USM
3. Dad saw his old baseball and basketball coaches from USM
4. Dad went to school with Coach, and got me into another sport there
5. Dad wanted to go to STARBUCKS :)
6. I wanted to go to Freeport and get that and go to A&F to see if Jimmy was working. We went to A&F, but Jimmy wasn't there yet, BUT Adam Libby works there I guess and he is Jimmy's manager and yay I saw Adam :) and! I got a new LIVESTRONG bracelt because Adam's was Child Size and mine was Adult Size and it makes sense for us to switch.
7. I got Starbucks :) and there is a Starbucks being put in in WATERVILLE :)
8. really bonded with dad today, and that feels good. :)

yep. UMF bound now. tomorrow I shall be home.
<3 Kait

oh boy

gone to USM for the day
and UMF for the night

nervous as HELL for the first one, excited like crazy for the second. I'll let you know tomorrow how the first one went... an the second one involves seeing Justin and Dan, so yayyy :) hehe. peace ;)

<3kait

haha interesting

I don't rememeber if I said this last time, but Rick and Aaron B quit work :( last night, it was crazy. They quit together boo to them they suck eachothers penis's. Haha today was alright. School was dece, till I ruined Staffy's day, and he's like my favorite teacher of all time and that just made me really sad :( then Morin kept me entertained for 80 mins with his random shit, and Woods enlightened me with an essay I wrote that was "exceptionally well written" and I got a really good grade / score for it :) hehe. then I made up a quiz for Morin, which I TOTALLY bombed... then I came home and ate lots of food. Jk. I came home, got ready, and went shoppin with Aimee. We stopped up at Colby too :) and went to Fabs to get gas... and I bought the Keith Urban cd... mmm he's yummy. Um, last night Justin told me he loved me :) that deff made me smile., Tonight I worked for 5 hours with Sam, Andrew, Mike, Carol and Sarah. I love that group haha... they are so much fun :) Andrew, you're dumb. "Katie, you and Andrew should just hook up and get it over with" jeesh Mike, someone a little deprived? haha. Andrew, you know I love you ;) then I came home to a house full! Chris, Mike, Sarah, Matt, Mom and Bob... Joe was already in bed. Me, Chris, Sarah and Mike went to DD to get doughnuts yum yum. Then Sarah went home, and now Im getting ready for bed. BIG DAY TOMORROW... Meeting with the USM FH coach and team... gah. Scared. So yeah, peace :)

Ps - last night, Dan scored a goal. That gets him points... hahaha

<3>

wow

I know this is totally crazy and totally pathetic, but I was just watching Laguna Beach, and I think I almost cried? yeah. weird. It was the one where they graduate and Lauren get's everyone that's graduating in their group to sit together, so it was like everyone minus Kristin, and it was just good. And Lo's parents got her a car, a Jetta, for grad gift, when Christina only got a Bible? Yeah, that's one fucked up rich town, but I don't care. It's the same everywhere else, I don't know what I am going to do after this year... Kt, Veronica and Danille are all I have... and next year, if I go to NEU, I'll be so far away it's almost crazy... and if I go to USM, we'll be close cos they all plan on going to SMCC... but if I go to NEU, UMF or FPC, we wont really be near eachother cept when we are home... man, I really don't know what I am going to do after graduation. This summer is gonna be a reality shock. I'm gonna have to save all my money and find a job whereever I am moving to before I get there, and meet my roomate, and get everything on my list for college stuff.. wow. I don't know if I want to stay in Maine anymore really... NEU is looking like a wonderful place, but it's in the city... and it's really close to Adam, which makes me feel safe. And FPC is kinda in the country of NH, and Brett's there so that makes me feel safe. Next year is going to be so different, not having to wake up at 530 to beat everyone else in this house to the shower, not having to listen to my mom bitch every 5 seconds, not having to deal with my brothers... but then again it's gonna be so weird being away from home, in a different place with someone I barely know.. wow. I don't know, I guess I'm probably just over reacting, but I really will be lost without my RichStuckUpBitches next year, I love you girls so much... gah. Well, I think I am gonna get going. I have to work at 5, then Dan's hockey game at 9 w/Dani... School and work tomorrow and USM Saturday to find out my fate with that... yep. So I'll write tomorrow maybe. I don't know. depends.

<3kait

long day

today over all sucked. I hated going to school and having to feel like such a bitch towards Beau, but everything he said to me last night just added up to the shit thats going on right now it didn't help. I am sorry, and I do accept your appology. We'll work on getting that friendship back in place, I promise. On the other hand, tonight I had to work... with him.. and she came in. Gahd. She came through drive-thru first and just kinda peeked in the window and saw me, and suddenly drove off, like she forgot something, and came back inside with the kids. honestly, dude, I don't want your efffing husband. chilll out. she scares me. I was glad I had to bring Mark home cos if not she probably would have, then she would have been there when I left and like slashed my tires or something. So I honestly don't know what is going through basketball coaches minds this year... Pellerin just. ugh, end of story right there. All I had to say was Pellerin. And Julie... cut Ashley.. and wow that's a horrible thing right there... wow. all I can say is wow. and more wows. I dont know, but I think Waterville lost some great talent. I mean, coaches are all big on "being young and strong" these days... but seriously, senior leadership is needed, and not by MW cos she isn't a good leader, shes a dumb bitch. Anywho, different subject. I don't know what I am going to do next year. Megan is making my choice harder and harder :( I don't want to leave my little sister alone for her freshman year of high school, everything she says is right. Things just wont be the same. I'm going to be possibly hundreds of miles away, possibly two states away, who knows. I'm not going to be here, and all I am going to do is miss her and wish I was home. Whats the point of college? to tear you away from your loved ones, I swear that's it. And now I'm thinking about me and Justin, what if something happens there thats really good... and lasts... and I get accepted to NEU? That would blow... and I just wouldn't want that. So I really am considering state schools now more than I was before, and I am happy about it. I don't know if it's because of Adam's influential words this past weekend, but it sure was something. Anywho, I think I am going to go find something to occupy my time since Justin apparently didn't take his laptop to poker, and probably go to bed eventually. So yeah, more tomorrow... I promise. Pinky Swear...p s tomorrows PAY DAY :-D

<3 Kait